I know a family who recently adopted a little girl from an impoverished nation in Africa. The girl has been living with her adopted family for several years and has been functioning quite well except for one area. You see, this little girl barely survived her first few years in Africa. She was alone living on the streets–starving. She would wait in line for days to be served a meager ration. Food was the one thing that was constantly on her mind. She barely survived and was always hungry–ravenously hungry.
Thankfully she was adopted by an American family who has provided her with love and plenty of food ever since. But, she can’t seem to shake her old habits concerning food. Her parents have found that she eats everything. She will take seconds and thirds and eat until she nearly bursts. At school, she will ask to visit the restroom and instead she will slip into the communal cubby area where all the kids keep their backpacks, coats and boots. There she systematically opens each backpack and rifles through each lunch box eating everything she can until she is caught. Although most of her other social behaviors would go by unnoticed she will eat, steal and hoard food at every opportunity. Why? She is fighting to survive. Her little mind convinces her that she must eat. She needs to eat. Her very life depends on it.
Her body is with a loving family who has plenty here in America but in her mind she is still a starving child living on the streets in Africa. Her mind hasn’t caught up with her present reality. She isn’t alone anymore. She is deeply loved and cared for. This is her new reality. Her mind just hasn’t embraced it yet.
CATCHING UP WITH REALITY
I do this same exact thing and my suspicion is that you do too. So much of what I do is designed to win your approval–to convince you that I am valuable. The jokes I make, the stories I tell and the clothes I wear are chosen to impress because I have a fierce need to be accepted and valued…and so do you.
My problem is that I haven’t embraced my present reality. Like the hungry little girl, I was an orphan and so were you.. Not in an physical sense but spiritually. You see, we are designed to find our belonging and value in a close relationship with our Creator and Father. When this relationship is estranged it is impossible for us to function as whole people. The brokenness within us will drive us to behaviors that don’t make sense–like eating everything in sight or in my case being funny, buying a pair of jeans I can’t afford or stretching the truth in a story to make myself look a little more impressive to you. I do this because I don’t feel like I belong. I don’t feel like I am loved.
ADOPTED
I love that the Apostle Paul described our new relationship with God through Jesus as adoption.
But when the right time came, God sent his Son, born of a woman, subject to the law. God sent him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that he could adopt us as his very own children. And because we are his children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, “Abba, Father.” Now you are no longer a slave but God’s own child. And since you are his child, God has made you his heir. (Galatians 4:4-6)
I can’t help but think that God looks at our behavior the same way that we look at the starving little girl–with pity and sadness. Don’t you realize that you don’t have to act that way anymore? You don’t have to lie. You don’t have to sleep with him. You don’t have to run to that addiction. Don’t you know that you are loved? Don’t you know that you are mine? Who cares what everyone else thinks? I love you.
I have a new reality. I am accepted and loved. I’ve been granted the privilege to call the Creator God, “Dad.” No offense but I’m going to stop caring about what you think of me. I don’t need to be funny, stretch the truth or dress a certain way to gain your approval because I don’t need it. I have the approval of my Father. I choose to believe my present reality and I invite you to do the same.
image credited to Even Earwicker via http://www.sxc.hu/
