Tag: Friends

The Law of Magnets

Have you ever found yourself in a crazy situation and wondered, “How in the world did I end up here?”  When I was in middle school, I hung out with some crazy guys who had a fondness for destruction.  We TPed the same girl’s house every weekend for six months.  We forked yards, egged cars and carried out other adventures of moderate destruction.

One night I found myself miles away from home, lying prone in a farmer’s field in the dead of winter as a spotlight scanned the field a few inches over my head.  Why was I there do you ask?  Well, my friends thought it would be a good idea to light a roll of 500 fire crackers and toss it into some guy’s satellite dish.  Afterward we ran like cheetahs until the aforementioned spotlight forced us to the frozen earth.

It was in that moment that I asked myself, “Self…How in the world did you end up here?”  Then, lying there, teeth chattering, I clicked my heels together and repeated, “There’s no place like home.  There’s no place like home.”  Turns out that doesn’t work.

But for real, how did I get there?  I was following the crowd.  I was doing what everyone else was doing.    I didn’t know it then but it was the Law of Magnets.

 

PILATE AND THE MOB

Throughout the Jesus story there are crowds.  Jesus was extremely popular and crowds followed him everywhere.  They were usually for Him.  But in one crucial moment, they were violently opposed to him.

Near the end of his life, Jesus was betrayed by one of his own disciples and handed over to the religious leaders—guys who hated him and wanted him dead.  Not having the power to execute Jesus themselves, they took him to Pilate who was the Roman governor of the region.  They accused him of leading an insurrection.  Pilate investigated the accusations and found that Jesus had done nothing wrong.  But then things got ugly.

“You brought this man to me, accusing him of leading a revolt. I have examined him thoroughly on this point in your presence and find him innocent… I will release him.”

Pilate isn’t a bad guy.  He’s a government official trying to do the right thing but then the Law of Magnets got him.

Then a mighty roar rose from the crowd, and with one voice they shouted, “Kill him, and release Barabbas to us!”  (Barabbas was in prison for taking part in an insurrection in Jerusalem against the government, and for murder.)  Pilate argued with them, because he wanted to release Jesus.  But they kept shouting, “Crucify him! Crucify him!”

For the third time he demanded, “Why? What crime has he committed? I have found no reason to sentence him to death. So I will have him flogged, and then I will release him.”

But the mob shouted louder and louder, demanding that Jesus be crucified, and their voices prevailed.  So Pilate sentenced Jesus to die as they demanded.  As they had requested, he released Barabbas, the man in prison for insurrection and murder. But he turned Jesus over to them to do as they wished.

THE LAW OF MAGNETS

This story blows my mind because Pilate wasn’t a bad guy.  Jesus was 100% innocent and yet a crowd, influenced by the religious leaders convinced Pilate to release a known murderer and execute an innocent man.  It just doesn’t make any sense.  It doesn’t make any sense, that is, unless, you understand the Law of Magnets.

The Law of Magnets has everything to do with crowds because crowds are powerfully magnetic.  They have a way of influencing people–magnetically pulling them toward the will of the crowd.   Maybe it’s because we are afraid of what they think or that we want to fit in.  Whatever the reason, crowds powerfully influence the way we think and act.

This is what happened to me with the firecrackers and the satellite dish and this is what happened to Pilate in Jerusalem.  This happens to you too.  I’m sure you can think of times in which a crowd magnetically pulled you into its orbit and you joined in with whatever it was doing.

Maybe it was with words.  It was degrading but everyone was doing it and suddenly you threw in an ugly but hilarious one-liner and everyone was doubling over with laughter.  Afterward you thought to yourself, “Why in the world did I say that?”  It was the Law of Magnets.

Maybe you were at a friend’s house and one minute it was video games and the next it was, “Hey let’s watch this, or smoke this, or drink this and you were like shocked but the crowd was doing it so you joined in.  It’s the Law of Magnets.

 

HOW’S YOUR CROWD?

I have a question for you:  Who is your crowd?  Who is the group that influences you?  Maybe it’s your circle of “besties,” your team, or the cast from the musical.  Who is your crowd?

Here’s an even better question:  How is your crowd?  Where does your crowd pull you?  Does it pull you to a healthier place or does it pull you in a darker place?  Is your crowd leading you closer to Jesus or further away?  After spending time with your crowd do you find yourself regularly asking, “How in the world did I end up here?”

Take a good look at your crowd.  Is this the direction you want to be pulled?  The Law of Magnets says that the more time you spend with them the more you’ll become like them.  That’s just how life works.  Maybe it’s time to evaluate who is influencing you.  Maybe it’s time to pay attention to the Law of Magnets.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Speaking Light

I grew up going to church from a young age.  As a little kid we used to sing this old song.  Perhaps you know it.  It goes like this:

“This little light of mine. I’m gonna let it shine.  Hide it under a bushel.  No!  I’m gonna let it shine.”

Like most songs I sang as a kid I had no idea what this song was about.  First off, what the heck is a bushel?  I actually thought the word was bush which was weird because I kept imagining sticking a candle in a bush and watching the whole thing burst into flames…which of course would have been awesome.

Mostly, I just enjoyed shouting “NO! I’m gonna let it shine!” as loudly as I could.  All little kids love shouting “NO!”

I learned much later that this goofy old song actually has roots in the Bible and coincidentally has nothing to do with setting stuff on fire.  The words actually come from Jesus.   In what scholars call the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said these words to his followers:

“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 

YOU ARE THE LIGHT

Jesus often referred to Himself as the light of the world, which makes sense because He is the Messiah. Through Him is forgiveness and life and peace with God.  He is the hope of the world.

But here, Jesus refers to His followers as the light of the world.  Essentially, he’s saying to you and me—you are the light of the world.  Wait what?  How does this work?  Because I don’t know about you but I don’t often feel like a light.

According to Jesus, I do have something to offer.  You do too.  Why?  Because we have a relationship with the Savior.  We know the Messiah.  The truth is that you’ve experienced Jesus in ways no one else has.  Jesus has shown up in your life in ways that He hasn’t shown up in mine.

The way you’ve experienced Jesus is something no one else knows—unless you talk about it.  You see, talking about Jesus and what He has done for you is a way of being a light.

WE NEED EACH OTHER

The truth is, we need each other.  We were not meant to pursue Jesus alone.  Community is crucial.

Recently, I realized that every significant decision in my life—every significant moment of spiritual growth, came out of a conversation.

  • I learned that God loves me and wants to rescue me because someone told me
  • I stopped manipulating girls in dating relationships because a friend explained to me the damage I was doing and how to stop it.
  • I pursued student ministry because someone told me that I could be a good youth pastor.

All the significant growth moments of my life began with a conversation.

I understand what Jesus was talking about with this whole “light and city on a hill” thing because I’ve experienced it—I’ve seen how it works in my life.  The words of God’s people can be a light to the people around them.

 

HEARING LIGHT

So, who is speaking light into your life?  Are you hearing more light or darkness from your friends?  Are there Jesus followers who you could become closer with?  We all need to hear some light.

The times in my life when I have struggled the most are the times in which I didn’t have friends and mentors speaking light into my life.  The times I was too lazy or stubborn to pursue community were the times I drifted away from God.

Who is speaking light into your life?

 

SPEAKING LIGHT

My second question is this:  who are you speaking light to?  Going back to Jesus’ words from the Sermon on the Mount.

Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.  In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

 

You have something meaningful and special.  Share it!  Don’t hide it!  The truth is, the world needs you.  You have something that no one can argue with.  It’s your experience with Jesus.  The ways He has brought life, healing and purpose to your life is something we need to hear about.

We weren’t meant to pursue Jesus alone.  It’s impossible.  We need each other.  The Jesus community is not as strong as it should be without you speaking up.  We need to hear your story.  We need to hear your encouragement.  We need you to challenge us.

Shine your light.  The world needs you.  We need you.

 

image credited to nuwandalice

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Back to School | Friends

Have you ever done anything dumb?  I mean really dumb?  I’m sure you have because I have too.  If I had to guess, I bet you didn’t do that dumb thing alone.  Or at least, you didn’t come up with the idea on your own.  You probably did that dumb thing with someone else or at least watched someone else do it and decided to try it out for yourself.  That’s the way we work.

We are deeply influenced by the people around us—far more than we want to admit.  My friend Jon has a saying, “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.”  He probably stole this phrase from some famous speaker or writer but I can’t figure out who, so for now, we’ll just credit the saying to Jon.

In any case, I think Jon is right on.  None of the major mistakes of my life are original to me.  I learned the behavior from my friends.  The perfect example is pornography.  I didn’t even know that such a thing existed until that ill-fated afternoon my friend discovered a dirty VHS tape in his parents’ bedroom and showed it to me.  It was the same story with stealing, using girls and the “F” bomb.  I would have never thought to do those things until someone showed me.

PROVERBS

I love the book of Proverbs.  The idea that an old guy wrote down a bunch of advice for a younger guy in the form of poetry really intrigues me.  I sort of wish someone would do that for me.  Anyway, one of the more helpful sayings in the Proverbs goes like this:

Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm. (Proverbs 13:20)

The basic idea of this saying is that you become like the people you hang out with.  With wise people you become wise and with fools you become a fool.  Personally, I believe this is spot on.  Over the course of my life, I’ve noticed that I watch the TV shows my friends watch.  My moral standards slide up or down based on who I’m hanging out with and my laugh even changes to become more like my friends.

I also believe that the closer the friend is, the more influence they have over you.  Best friends and the people we date possess an incredible power over us.  It has nothing to do with being weak or giving into peer pressure, it’s simply how life works.  I think is how we are designed.  Community and relationships are incredibly important and influential to us all.

EVALUATE

So, if all this is true—Jon’s theory and the book of Proverbs, we all need to evaluate our friendships.  If we are going to become just like our friends we should probably really like who they are.  Do you like the decisions your friends make?  Do you agree with their moral standards?  Do you like how they treat people?  Are they wise or are they fools?

There have been 2 times in my life, once during my sophomore year of high school and once during my freshman year of college in which I chose to migrate friend groups.  In both cases, I looked around and realized that I didn’t want to become like the people I was spending all my time with.  In high school, I realized that I didn’t want my life to be characterized by partying, porn and vandalism so I peaced out.  I told my friends why I was breaking up with them and then bounced.  Yes it was painful and lonely and they mocked me brutally but in the end it was very good for me.  God provided new friends who led me closer to Him.

BACK TO SCHOOL           

As you reenter the school scene, are you happy with your social situation?  Will your friends lead you to greater life, purpose, and meaning?  Do you like who you are becoming?  Are you hanging with the wise or with fools?  If you know you need a change, the fall season is a great time to migrate.

 

Photo Credited to JDConway